Mommy Moments

My "mommy moments" are few and far between. They aren't every day and they are never the same. What I consider to be a "mommy moment" is when Grace will snuggle up to me and just stay there for awhile. When Hope lays her head on my shoulder and sighs with complete contentment. When Grace tells me she loves me and isn't just saying it to get out of trouble. When Hope smiles because she is standing all by herself. When Grace tells me a funny story or sings me a song that she made up. When Hope laughs so hard her voice starts getting hoarse. 

Those are just a few of my  precious "mommy moments". Most of the time my days don't like a perfectly positioned Christmas card. It looks like some crazy family scetch in the comics section of the newspaper. There are toys all over the floor, all the time. There is cookie remains smeared on my leather sofa. There is pieces of peas, carrots, and chicken scattered underneath my dining room table. There is a permanent piece of band-aide stuck to my hallway wall and I have yet to be able to get off.  And I won't even begin to mention what I find in the toilet half the time.....not flushed! Being a stay at home mom is no piece of cake. I have had the whole debate on which is harder, SAHM or working mom, and still haven't come up with a winning team. I think no matter your situation, we all work so hard to be the best we can be for our kids. We all say things like, "It is all worth it." or "It is the best." I'm sorry but, are you kidding me? It ISN'T worth it all the time. It ISN'T the best all the time. But, for some weird reason we all just keep on popping those little munchkins out. Sure the "conceiving" phase is a blast. My husband always loved it when we got to the "we're trying to get pregnant" phase of parenting. Then he paid for it all after I would get prego and didn't want him touching me for close to 10 months.

Yep, those "mommy moments" are everything we live for. From getting our little one their first outfit to buying my girls their precious baby dolls for Christmas. Those are my "mommy moments".  The water splashing everywhere in the bathtub while my oldest sings a song about being a mermaid and I stand in hallway to listen, that is my "mommy moment".  Smiling while I hear my two girls laughing at each other at nap time is my "mommy moment". All the slobbery kisses and the choking hugs are my pay checks for being their mom. They are my moments and mine alone. Because with all of those moments it truly does make it all worth it and the best! 

Toys R Us vs. The "NEW" Grandparent

I found an interesting blog post and had to post a link to it for you to check out. I was really in shock over this because my mom became a grandma at the age of 46! Without saying too much, just check it out here.

Just some memories

This was taken in 2000, he STILL looks the same! 

When Bryan and I were first married I remember our first Christmas. Bryan was working at Circuit City back when they were on commission, and didn't bring home very good paychecks. He was going to Evangel as a full time student. I was working as a receptionist with a local doctor's office. Which is where I first fell in love with the medical profession. I drove a Ford Explorer that we had just bought a month after we got married in March. Bryan drove his high school Ford Mustang with red interior. (there are memories in that car which we won't discuss) Life was simple and we were dirt poor. We were living on the north side of Springfield in a cute little one bedroom apartment. It wasn't much but it was nice. We had our little Yorkie, Gizmo, that kept me company while Bryan worked late most evenings. I remember playing The Sims on a PC or chatting online with my mom who was living overseas at the time. We didn't have many friends. Just each other. Our first Christmas was simple but so much fun.

This will be our 7th Christmas together as a married couple. Much has changed. We no longer have the Ford Explorer. It was taken to the scrap metal place because it was a piece of crap. We no longer have the Ford Mustang with red interior that reminded us how cool we were. We sold it right before Grace was born. We no longer have our Yorkie, Gizmo. He died last March of being really sick and old. (I miss my little friend) As of almost 5 years ago, we adopted Angel, our Yorkie-Poo who is laying next to me sleeping right now. As of 3 1/2 years ago, we welcomed our first little girl into the world, Grace Kristine. BOY, did she turn us upside down! We have moved many times. My parents are living in Springfield now. My brother is married. My sister is almost 27!!! Bryan's grandfather has passed away. We have been fired from a church simply because the main tithers didn't like who the pastor hired and wanted the "other" guy back. We have been employed at a Methodist church. We have lived with Bryan's parents. We have converted to being exclusive Mac users. (some things are just necessary changes) We have had 3 miscarriages one at 19 weeks. We gave birth to our miracle baby this year, Hope Louise. And through all the changes, ups and downs, ins and outs, there is only TWO things that have never changed. 

1) I still love my husband!!

2) God is still God. 

We all deal with life is different ways. Me, I tend to stress, worry, and dwell on whatever is bothering me at the time. So much so that I then go for the emotional eating and like to drown my sorrows with Oreos. Which I just happened to have in my cabinet this morning. The new kind with candy cane filling! Yum! I never buy things like that but I had a moment of weakness at the grocery store last week. And they were just calling my name when I went to the kitchen cabinet with my stresses. I opened the package and ate 2 right off! Then after feeling horribly guilty went and ate another 2. The four Oreos that I consumed did not even lift my worry and stress over my life right now. It just made me feel like I had bigger problems and looked like a cow! 

I stood at the table spooning green beans with rice into Hope's mouth not really focusing on much of anything. Going through the motions until nap time, I guess. It is just one of those days. Out of the corner of my mind I heard something that stopped all my desperate attempts at SELF preservation. It was Grace. She was in her room playing and singing, to what I assume was probably her baby, "Here I am to worshipppp.....You're my God..........Your lovely, You're my God.......Here I am to worship......." I got tears in my eyes because in my complete blindness of SELF I had really forgotten to do the thing that comes most naturally to me, worship.  As I focused on Hope and green beans, I began singing right along with Grace. Instead of going to the cabinet with my stress and worry, I should have gone to God. Instead of complaining about it all, I should concentrate on worshipping the One who makes everything a little more bearable. The One who makes this life worth living. My wonderful Savior. 

Now, I gotta go work those Oreos off on the elliptical and while doing that I'll hide this scripture in my heart and fill my mind with the blessing all around me. Grace being one of them. And Hope being the other. Both God's and mine. 

Philippians 4:8 (The Message)

Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious-the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and god, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

Because I said so!

"Because I said so....." This is such a popular phrase that it became the title of a movie!  I am sure you have heard it before, right? There are things that my mom would say that I vowed I would never say and now I am saying them. When Grace is fussy and whining to me about watching a movie and I tell her "no"..........the ugly whining begins. "Why, Mommy?" and instead of explaining to her that I don't want to hear the noise right now of the tv and that she already watched a movie this morning and she doesn't need to watch another one because it will fry her brain, I tell her "because I said so!" Well, my oldest daughter is really just a cookie cut of myself and just like myself that explanation just isn't enough for her. So then we get into the 30 minute long "whaaaa session" that usually includes her being in time out until she stops whining and arguing with me. 

What do you do when your child is just like you and it irritates you to the point of exhaustion? When I look at her all I can see is that independent, self assured, and strong willed person that I am. I think of my past and get scared. I wasn't a horrible teenager but I sure wasn't the best! I did things I'm not proud of and only now does it scare me to death! How I can I prepare her to make the right choices? It is something that sends me to my knees. I guess right now I'll try not to worry too much about her turning 16 and just try to get her and I, both, in one piece to her turning 4! 

My 411 on Stocking Stuffers

I subscribe to a magazine every year for Christmas. I love to lay in the tub with a cup of hot tea, turn the jets on, and relax with my magazine. It is a major "ME" time that I take every once in awhile. I received my new "House Beautiful" in the mail the other day and began to soak up the info in the tub last night. I got to the "special feature" of the "101 Stocking Stuffers" and got excited. I love stocking stuffers and am always looking for unique things to put in the girls stockings. As a kid I remember running into the living room and heading straight for my stocking. I loved pouring it all out and going through all the prizes. It is like opening up a Cracker Jack box x 10! I always got things like little bottles of lotion, speciality lip gloss, a nail file with flowers on it, maybe a small bottle of perfume, sticky notes with a "K" on them and my latest favorite from last year, an iTunes gift card. As much as I love the stocking part, nothing in there is over $20. But, that is the fun of the stocking. It isn't how much was spent as much as it is all the little treasures. My mom still makes the stocking lots of fun and it is still one of my favorites parts of Christmas morning. 

So, you can imagine my disappointment when I started looking at the 101 things that "House Beautiful deemed as good stocking stuffers. I am not sure how everyone else lives but, well just take a look and tell me what you think?

1837 Tape Measure in Sterling Silver

$225, Tiffany & Co.

Mustard Mini Make-Up Brush Roll

$365, Smythson

Caramel-Filled Chocolate Dominoes

$45, Williams-Sonoma

Fenway Park Pen

$260, Neiman Marcus

Now, don't get me wrong. If you have the money to spend $365 on a stocking stuffer, be my guest. But, I do not have that kind of money to spend on a GIFT much less a stocking stuffer. Get a clue, House Beautiful. Here is my stocking stuffer ideas for all the REST of us:

Crabtree & Evelyn Bath Set

$13.20 

All Performance Fleece Scarf

$5.00 Old Navy

iTunes Gift Card

$15, Apple.com

Cranberry Shimmer Lip Balm

$5.60, The Body Shop

M&M's Premiums

$3.99, Target

Memories; Redefined

I heard of some tragic news about 2 months ago that really stung my heart. Scott Jett, who was once the director of Shapes Mentoring and a new professor at CBC, died in a horrible motorcycle accident. The part that really shook me up was that he left behind a wife with 4 children and another on the way. This mom of 5 has been on my heart since I heard about them. I have prayed for them and tonight, at church, I met them. We had our annual Missions Convention and the Jett family were a focus family for a special gift giveaway. It was really neat to watch the kids getting new bicycles, coats, and other toys. I sat watching this family in complete awe and heartache. Why her? Why them? None of it makes sense. And why not me? 

My husband Bryan drives 40 minutes one way every day to work. It is a windy highway and I worry about him constantly. This woman's story could so easily be mine. Or even yours. It makes me stop and listen more carefully to his stories. It makes me want to pocket away the smell of him when he comes close. It makes me stare a little longer and breathe a little deeper. It makes me savor his touch and hold onto his hand tighter. It makes me smile a little wider when he does something silly.  To not take anything for granted would be exceptional. Not taking for granted the warm body laying next to me in bed and the inevitable snoring.  The "I love yous". The phone calls during the day just to know how I am. I want to treasure each and every moment with my husband. Not taking for granted that he lets me sleep in every other morning. Not taking for granted that he gives me back rubs. Not taking for granted our time together in long talks over hot tea. Not taking for granted the father he is to my girls. Not taking any of it for granted. I know I will, I am only human. I wish I wouldn't though. I wish I was a good enough person to never get mad at him again for his procrastination. Or to not get annoyed at him gulping his drink. I wish I would never again roll my eyes at his jokes or push away his untimely advances. I wish I could savor the moments both good and bad. I will try to hold on to every memory; memories redefined.