Forgiving Moment by Bryan & Kristin Thompson

Kristin's words

At 10:00 a.m. I told Grace that we would be watching "UP" tonight as a family. I told her that she would not be watching tv of any kind the entire day until her room was cleaned up. I had spent so much time on Monday cleaning up her room myself and it was completely a disaster within 24 hours. After telling her this she then informs me that she was too tired to clean so I told her that she could lay down and take a nap and THEN clean up her room. I took this opportunity for her to take a nap since Hope was also laying down. Both kids laying down at the same time, I couldn't pass that up!

After naptime, Grace was told again about no tv unless her room got cleaned up. She played in her room instead. I kept reminding her all afternoon and she kept making more of a mess than cleaning up. I knew what was coming that evening but tried to think positively. After dinner and baths, I then told Grace that in 20 minutes we were going to sit down and watch "UP" as a family and that she would not be watching it unless her room was cleaned up. She kept saying that she wanted to watch it really, really bad. I then explained to her, "You have the choice. You can clean up your room and watch, "UP" or you can choose to mess around and not clean up and not watch the movie. It is up to you." 10 minutes went by and not much progress. 15 minutes went by. 20 minutes. Then almost 30 minutes, as I was trying to give her a chance to make a good choice, and still the room was not cleaned up and it was also accompanied by an attitude which got her a trip straight to bed. It was 6:00p.m. and not only was her room totally not even close to being clean but her attitude was really aweful. After the tantrum of realizing that she would not be watching the movie with Mommy, Daddy, and Hope, I spoke to her in a calm voice about her choices yet again.

Consequences are so hard on all of us and they are even harder to learn. But, teaching my kids consequences is my job. I would much rather teach them that their are consequences to their action than them have to learn this lesson the hard way out on their own in the real world.

Bryan's words:

She had been in bed for fifteen minutes and her mom and I discussed how disappointed we were that she had made the decision she had. We talked about forgiveness, but we also discussed the need for consistency. We do get what we deserve, after all. Or do we?

After a few minutes of tossing the idea around, we decided it may be the perfect opportunity to teach Grace all about...well...grace.

I walked into her room. She immediately quivered and her tears were wetting her pillow. I sat down.

"Grace," I said, "I want to tell you a story."

She curled up next to me, her four-year-old body still shaking.

"In the beginning of time, God created every person and everything we can imagine. And God created us to love. God wanted to show love to us, and God wanted us to show love to each other. We were made to be kind to each other, to give to each other. But we didn't do what God created us to do. We found ways to hurt people and to do terrible things to each other. And we broke God's heart. And the Bible tells us that God is good and cannot be around bad. People had made bad decisions, and we didn't deserve the love of God.

"But even though we didn't deserve God's love, God chose to do something amazing. God sent Jesus to earth to show us what real love is. Real love is doing everything you can for someone even though they don't deserve it. And because doing bad has to be punished, Jesus chose to take our punishment so we wouldn't have to. So Jesus allowed others to hurt and to kill him. God showed us GRACE. Grace means giving something GOOD to someone when they don't deserve it."

I held her and said, "Grace, did you deserve to watch the movie?"

She shook her head.

"That's right," I said. "You didn't deserve it. Just like we didn't deserve God. But just like God showed us grace, your mom and I are going to show you grace. We're going to give to you even though you don't deserve it."

Grace was now in tears as she hugged me. "I'm so sorry," she said. And I knew she was.